Category Archives: simulations

Doo. Dee doo. Dee da doo… dee doo. (Doodly doodly doodly doodly doodly.)

The late Christopher Longuet-Higgins invented a musical shoe, which could tap along to arbitrary pieces of music that were played to it. I wonder how easy it would be to write a tool that took music and rendered it into … Continue reading

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Parliamentary arithmetic

I think I understand the Tory party’s thinking now. They’re using a special non-contradictory arithmetic where if you start with zero, and add x, you can get out any number you like. Worked example: Take the number of UKIP MPs … Continue reading

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Hidden degrees of economic freedom

Some people in the UK are very keen on the imperial system of weights and measures as a symbol of national identity, even though each of the units is pegged to the SI system and in fact affords the government … Continue reading

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The universal grindr

(1a) Nigel likes cock. (1b) ?Nigel likes a cock. Do you know about grinding? I know about grinding. Grinding is taking a count noun, say, “chicken” or “fir”, and instead of saying “two chickens” or “three firs” saying “some chicken” … Continue reading

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Remote censoring

I don’t want to watch much of the stuff the BBFC classifies, and nor, I suspect, do the people who work for the BBFC. Surely, I thought, we could get a machine to do this? There won’t be much chance … Continue reading

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